AM I MISSING OUT?

I don't go out anymore. My life has been Luis, home, Polo, PT, and the grocery. By the end of the day, going out is the last thing on my mind. Dialing for my masahista beats any going out, a lot cheaper too. As people know, I hardly check my Facebook account. I only check for pictures and that's basically it. I find it too chaotic. Too many things going on. I have been having family dinners, lunches, merienda cenas, and everything else with food in it. It makes me happy but I wonder if I'm missing out on being a 30-something single mom. I see my friend's pictures and they seem to be out all the time. They have kids too, three even, and yet they have time to be out all the time. My best bud and constant companion now is my 9 year old son. No doubt about it, we have a blast all in the comforts of my room. It's like we have room service on a daily basis since my mom eats out all the time. In a week, she only has dinner here once or twice at the most. I don't know where she gets the energy.

It's a known fact that if my mom or dad can't stay with Luis, I don't leave him. I guess now, I really have no one to leave Luis with since my mom is out all the time and obviously my dad is no longer around. I'm on the net 24/7 practically checking on my small business, looking around for more things or services to resell and just surfing. Although, I must admit, I'm having a hard time with the puny laptop that does not have the programs I need for basic desktop publishing. I wonder when I'll get my own laptop finally? How many bottles of this and that will I need to sell?

I'm missing all these movies that I can watch for FREE but I don't really have a regular person or group to watch movies with. My dear friend who is usually the easiest to take to the movies with me is and will be bedridden until she gives birth. We used to have 2 drivers but one was let go since my dad passed away. The one that got left behind goes home every Tuesdays and Thursdays and will ask for overtime pay if I use him after 8pm. Wtf?! After a certain time at night, the helpers retreat to their 3rd floor attic and disappear afraid that the ass is going to make them utos this and that especially if my mom is not at home. So after cleaning and washing duties, 4 of them scramble away like ants, even running up the stairs 2 or 3 steps at a time just to avoid the ass.

Speaking of the ass, my cousins and I planned a beach trip to Montemar last December. On the 9th day of my dad's Novena prayers, the ass was so loud and planning this and that about going to the beach. Dang, when I overheard him, right away, my brain switched off and deleted any beach trip planning even though I was in charge of the e-group site. 2 days before the beach trip, my mom asks the ass if he was going, he said NO! Putang ina! I swear I wanted to kill him! I am not one to use swear words in my daily vocab but when I do ohboy! stay clear. I could have gone but it's not that easy for me to just pack up and go. I have to plan. It just goes to show that ANYTHING that comes out from the asses mouth is PURE BULL and ALL for SHOW! It was my fault that I tuned off as soon as I heard the news that the ass was going, I should have made the bookings, and really plan. Next time. Shit! Inisahan ako.

You should see the maids' faces when they find out that my mom, Luis and I are eating out. It's like "Maam! Help US!" It's like they really want my mom to have dinner at home. The cook especially. Why won't anyone believe me that that ass needs mental help?! My mom is obviously in denial all the time. She was hynotized by that ass some way. See it's 2:36am and guess what I can smell some canned good being cooked. It's either luncheon meat or something. Puneta, if that ass denies it, tang...!! Hell will break loose again. Then again, the more processed meats that ass eats the faster he will die!! Yay! Doesn't my mom see that NO ONE wants to be with that ass? Doesn't my mom see that NO ONE pays attention to him at all?? Everyone thinks he is an ass any way. hay... useless! Really useless. I pray that he gets kicked out of the house SOON!!!!!